So, one of my bestie’s moving van comes today. It’s really real. She’s going to move to the opposite side of the country. I know with facebook and blogging and everything, we’ll be able to keep up with each other, but it just won’t be the same as having a friend down the street to call and invite to an impromptu playdate or walk in the park, or please bring us some sprite and crackers and leave it on the door because all of us are so sick. I am going to miss her so much.
One of the good things to come out of this is I can really see how kind and empathetic my children are. I was crying after church yesterday and my sweet girl made me a “smiley face snack, so I could smile again” and brought me flowers. Sweet baby boy said ” Why crying, Mama? I Love You.” He hasn’t said that since he was 11 months old. Heart melting.
How does all this relate to being a mom with ADHD? If you’re reading this, you know that we have a harder time than most making friends and keeping them. I want to write down a few helpful hints, to help you, dear reader, and remind myself.
1. Give gifts. This is pretty self explanatory. You totally don’t have to spend money. Gifts of your time and talent count too.
2. Have rituals. This could be as simple as meeting at the farmer’s market every week. Structure and regularity are good for everyone.
3. Remember things. Their birthdays, their kid’s birthdays, kid’s allergies, you get the idea. Everyone likes to feel important enough to be paid attention to. Which brings me to my final point;
4. Pay attention. I know this is hard. Medication can help. It is so important to any relationship, that it’s worth stating even though it seems obvious.
This is by no means exhaustive, but it’s a good start.
What are some ways you find useful to make friends?